Sorry @blunderman1 and @spidersneedlovetoo that you had to deal with such toxic players. Your stories come from two rather different backgrounds but share a common thread. blunderman's story is quite tragic, in fact, because I just find it utterly incomprehensible how little overlap there is between the crazyhouse and bughouse communities. I mean, that is not surprising because it mostly boils down to toxicity, but it's rather aggravating that such a fractured and small community gets even smaller.
I agree with you, blunderman, that my approach perhaps reeks of too much reductionism. I think the reason so many players are so toxic can best be described using your own terms: "you instinctively blame partner for ruining what you have 'worked so hard to achieve'". The misconception here, of course, is that these toxic players don't understand that there are these countless small decisions that can affect the game and that some of them really boil down to factors that your partner cannot control. On a related note, I think the most convincing argument to "rehabilitate" these toxic players is that being toxic makes you lose more because your partners will be rightfully angered by your behavior and will not play as well as they could had you not been attacking them with a barrage of insults. Therefore, it is in the best interests of the toxic player to not be toxic if they want to win!
"bughouse is a game that, with the proper formatting, can even reduce toxicity and emotional violence in our society" That is a very nice thought, spiders, and speaks to my inner idealism! I hope that that can be proven eventually.
I agree with you, blunderman, that my approach perhaps reeks of too much reductionism. I think the reason so many players are so toxic can best be described using your own terms: "you instinctively blame partner for ruining what you have 'worked so hard to achieve'". The misconception here, of course, is that these toxic players don't understand that there are these countless small decisions that can affect the game and that some of them really boil down to factors that your partner cannot control. On a related note, I think the most convincing argument to "rehabilitate" these toxic players is that being toxic makes you lose more because your partners will be rightfully angered by your behavior and will not play as well as they could had you not been attacking them with a barrage of insults. Therefore, it is in the best interests of the toxic player to not be toxic if they want to win!
"bughouse is a game that, with the proper formatting, can even reduce toxicity and emotional violence in our society" That is a very nice thought, spiders, and speaks to my inner idealism! I hope that that can be proven eventually.